free ecards

Baby and Toddler Sleep - Birthdays and the Night You Were Born

By Margaret Saunders

For many years, Birthdays in our home were very simple, simple. We invited one friend and her parent or parents and my daughter Alicia's dearly beloved Grandma who she called "Gramma" who lived "down the road and around the corner." We always had a birthday cake (which was either chocolate or ice cream) and as sugary food was rarely seen in our house (this was the biggest treat) and very simple party food.

Anticipation of her Birthday was the big thing for Alicia. For many weeks this anticipation was enjoyed as much as the actual Birthday itself. Almost better than the blowing out of the candles ceremony and opening of the presents after breakfast.

Alicia thought that her birthday was "the cake ceremony", not the whole day. On one of her birthdays she asked, "When is my Birthday, Mum?" "It's right now love".

Eventually the penny dropped when she said, "When do we have the CAKE?" For her, the birthday was the cake, the candles and the singing of Happy Birthday. Not the fussing, the organizing, the people, the extra cleaning. Not the preparing for the day, the games, the take home bags, the outdoing of other peoples parties. We always planned The Cake Event for the morning. Alicia never knew parties could be a big event with lots of games and lots of people until she was quite a bit older. When we had these small event birthdays we had less dramas less upsets and more fun. One year we lashed out and had a party at a shop that did fairy parties with a minimum of 10 children, plus a few mums and dads. Most of the activities were rushed and in a cramped space and not much party food was eaten. Accidents happened and upsets appeared over misunderstandings and the cake was not the one Alicia had seen arrive and this caused a big upset and teasing. Every child but one got upset.

On the way home Alicia burst into tears, again. After the expense, the organizing, the extra travel she would have been happier with a few special friends, a cake ceremony and just one toy she could have played with. We have never had a large party since and we have not since had a hugely structured party or gone to a venue for an event. And we always unwrap the presents when everyone has arrived.

We sit in a circle and the birthday presents are passed and given to the birthday person one at a time by the child who brought them and then unwrapped and passed around for everyone to look at and check out. The giver of the present is thanked and gets as much as a thrill at the present receiver. This present ceremony is one of the first things we do and usually starts off our parties.

One of our best and more simple and more easier Birthdays when Alicia was older was soon after we moved from the city. We were renting a "beach house". We invited one friend from the city and one new friend from the country. It was more of an "all day visit" party. Yes, we had a cake, a small amount of party food and the present opening ceremony. Alicia felt she was the birthday girl for the whole day. This home was on a sheep farm, with large rooms and sheep in the back yard. At this party we introduced a few games and threw a Frisbee around the back yard, which was really a paddock and chased the sheep! This party was a huge success. Guests were more than happy to travel the longer distance to the farm and the mums sat on the back verandah and watched the party from a distance, breathed in the fresh farm air and watched what it is that sheep do.

All in all there is a lead up to birthdays. I tell my daughters the story of their birth. As Alicia still reminds me, birthdays are really anniversaries of the day they were born.

With Alicia, I tell her how I worked right up to the day before she was born. As I was driving home my mantra was "please, please wait until I get home, please, please, wait until I get home". Alicia loves to hear this. The story continues with how I was a week overdue and I really was worried that contractions would start as I was driving home (and as she was my first born I had no idea what contractions would feel like and what sort of pain to expect, I just knew I did not want them to happen on the freeway driving home in the rush hour.

When I had attended the pre-natal classes one of the things I had learnt was that giving birth was like running in a marathon and to eat marathon type food in the early stages of labor. Well I did all that and climbed into bed and BINGO in the early hours of the morning contractions woke me up and about 12 hours later Alicia was born, at 6.23 pm on the 23rd of June. Catchy numbers!!! I tell this story every year the night before her birthday and embellish different parts, answer her questions and find that the bond between us increases every time. Both my daughters love this part of their Birthday celebrations and sometimes ask me to tell them their birth story when it is not even their birthday, just to hear the wonder of it all. So if you want a simple, easy, country style birthday here are some tips.

Step By Step

1. When your child is young, one or two invited guests plus parents can be enough for a party, plus a beloved relative or two.

2. Building up the anticipation and reliving the event can be enjoyed over many days and weeks.

3. A Cake and Candle Ceremony may be all that's needed.

4. Having the party in the morning can relieve the tension of waiting and waiting.

5. Opening the presents. Have the party guests and birthday child sit in a circle. Have the guests one at a time hand the present they have brought to the birthday child who opens the present and then passes it around the circle. This can be a great way to start the party.

6. Even when your child is older, smaller and little effort can still work, for
example, a walk on the beach, a trip to a special playground or watching a movie.

7. Tell your child the story of the day or night they were born.


No comments: